Monday, September 6, 2010

Resolution check up

This has been a year of alot of growth and balance for me. I'm really happy with where I am in most areas of my life.  I'm looking forward to what the last quarter will bring!!

1 Organizing Clean out the basement. Finish purging and get it to Goodwill by 3/1  Did it and now working on a complete purge!
2 Financial Pay off bills. Keep chipping away and no travel plan probably for another year. Sucky but effective. Get at least 3 medical bills paid off and continue to live on cash.  On track. Debt free in 2011. And got the bonus of an impromptu trip to Memphis!! Have one small medical bill left!!
3 Treat myself Get a pedicure in May, July, September. See 10 movies, and read 12 books Got pedi in July, have seen way more than 10 movies and read 12+ books. Haven't picked one up all summer!
4 Stay in Touch Call Mondays-Judy on the way to work; Melissa on the way home. Thursdays-Michelle. Lunch with Lauren once a month, hang out with Cassie 2x/month Go to Scrap Cabana crops with Theresa  Making the calls, but they don't work out ALOT of the time. No lunches with Lauren and hanging out with Cassie is really hard; she's working and both she and Lauren have schedule opposite of me.  Crops with Theresa have been on track but don't know what will happen in the fall...
5 Give time Continue to volunteer at the Bin, work with small groups and SW office. Step away from RFKC. Ended up stepping away from the Bin instead of RFKC. It was a good decision, but a difficult and sad one at the time. No regrets.
6 Health Be aware of what goes in my mouth; stay on eating plan; work out 30 minutes on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays  This is the one I need to focus on the most this fall.
7 Scrapping 365 pages, 12 projects from the tower o'projects and get my pages in albums immediately. Focus on Joseph and Cassie at Scrap Cabana crops. At 490 pages, 2 projects, they are in the albums (at this point anyway!!) and have focused on C&J to the point of them being in the year 2000. LOL Hope to have their school years scrapped by the end of the year.
8 Spiritual Read through the NT this year. Be aware of what is coming out of my mouth..especially when I'm frustrated!  Current with the reading plan; much better about my mouth and attitude. Pastor Joel has even commented on it a couple of time...
9 Marriage Be intentional with Paul…not sure what this is going to look like in action, but something needs to change!!  Being intentional, today, looks like grieving that apparent fact that this is as good as it's going to get. He's "resistant" in his own words, to doing any kind of recovery work. I'll add defensive and resentful. But I think I am accepting it and building a good life with him and zero/little intimacy.  Most of the time it's good. And when it's not, I've learned to focus elsewhere and move on. Letting go daily is a huge step and mourning the belief that he'd step up because he promised he would has been a long journey this year.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Been Scrapping

Watching Ronnie for 10 days, while Chris recovers from surgery and have done more scrapping since he's been here than the month before!! As soon as he takes his nap or goes to bed for the night, I bolt to my scrapbooking room and start going. These are all old portraits found while cleaning the basement. I "deframed" them and scrapped them all!!
All inspired by an old Scrapbooks, Etc. magazine. All made from stash. Some of this stash is 15 years old! My focus for September is to:  Do a layout a day and use alot of my brown stash. It's the only one that is stlll completely out of control!! LOL

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Whip it Up Wednesday


I have to go to a potluck Friday, so I'm cruising my healthy meal planning sites and was reminded of this delicious salad I made for Easter. It's Cucumber Pineapple Salad...so light and refreshing. You can cut down on the sugar even more, I think. Like half of that would work. Now to find the strawberry poppyseed one.

Serves 4

Ingredients
1/4 cup sugar
2/3 cup rice wine vinegar
2 tablespoons water
1 cup fresh pineapple, peeled, cored and cut into 1/4-inch pieces
1 cucumber, peeled and thinly sliced
1 carrot, peeled and julienne
1/3 cup thinly sliced red onion (I'd also cut this in half...they all got picked out anyway)
4 cups torn salad greens
1 tablespoon sesame seeds, toasted

Directions
In a heavy saucepan, bring the sugar, vinegar and water to a boil. Stir constantly until reduced to about 1/2 cup, about 5 minutes. Transfer to a large bowl and place in the refrigerator until cool. Add the pineapple. Cover and return to the refrigerator for 1 hour.
Add the cucumbers, carrots and red onions to the pineapple mixture. Toss well.
To serve, divide the salad greens among the plates. Top with the pineapple mixture and sprinkle with toasted sesame seeds. Serve immediately.

And here are a couple of cards I'm VERY proud of!! I learned how to make shape cards on my Design Studio. These are both from Create a Critter and done completely from scraps.






Thursday, May 20, 2010

13 Thursday

I'm going to be chilling at my desk today, so I thought I'd do a desk themed blog. I'm cutting out 250 lightbulb doorhangers for our church...needed this Sunday!! Crazy...

13 things that are around my desk:

1. Bears notepad

2. Pier One coffee cup with tea and peppermint creamer

3. Jacked up blackberry still waiting for my trackball

4. light blue CM pen

5. labelmaker

6. insurance forms waiting to be submitted (forgot the website to download them from!)

7. Quote rolodex with tons of quotes to be put in there

8. cricut

9. camera

10. timer to keep me on task for computer (read: Facebook) time

11. gratitude journal

12. Project Life 2010 Scrapbook

13. bowl with yummy waffles

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Whip it up Wednesday

So this is usually a recipe but today, I whipped up some cards. I used Give a Hoot for the Owl one and Create a Critter cricut cartridges for the prince charming one. Embossed the crown and stickled the heart.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Marriage Monday

Paul and I seem to be at a place we can both live with. We are enjoying each other's company alot more than in the past 5 years; we forgive and move on quickly (good thing after that Mother's Day thing!! LOL) and we can talk about things without having fights.
Case in point...he's being very attentive...flowers, cards, dates. I love every minute of them. And yet, little intimacy. Lots of I like you moments but nothing of what is going on in his life or his heart. So I talked to him about it again, for about the 10th time this month, and asked him what's going on. He listened. He responded. Now to see if he acts.
We went to see Robin Hood last night. GREAT movie!! It's worth full price, especially if you're a history lover like me. Two and a half hours of history. I'll definitely see it again. It was great to just be walking in the mall and decide to see what time movies were and be able to go...
He kissed me in church yesterday. And I let him. Maybe we are finding our way back. I pray we are, and honestly, fear that we aren't. That this is just a blip and things will go back. For today, I choose to reject fear and go with faith. Healing is happening. And healing takes time.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Finish It Friday

Today is SUCH a finishing day!! Got my explosion box figured out; it looks like this... This isn't the one I did but I'm on a finishing roll and don't want to stop for pix...I like that I can make them now. Something that's been on my list for a few years to learn. So easy!!
Finished loading up and organizing pix too. 248 off to CVS for the 12 cent sale.
Finished my laminating project for Brian.
Finished our small group study too.

Now off to finish laundry and dusting and call it a very successful finish it Friday!!
Had an epiphany today...I stay up late and when I go to bed, Paul almost always wakes up and we have a conversation. He's already going to bed late to spend more time with me. I think it's selfish of me to stay up late and make him even more sleep deprived. It was different when he'd sleep through me coming to bed. Different when we weren't talking at all. Different when we were living separate lives under the same roof. But i want to do my part. And my part for this area is to go to bed earlier. I hope I remember come bed time!! LOL

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Thoughtful Thursday

Today is Thursday, right? I've been thinking alot...about relationships.
I've been watching, kinda from a distance emotionally, as my marriage seems to be becoming something other than what it used to be. Getting notes from my husband saying he appreciates me, but then being treated pretty crappy on Mother's Day. Having a meltdown about it.  Then, acting as if none of that happened, yesterday he comes home with a movie and was going to make me dinner (but I'd already eaten). Left me a note today saying he appreciates me more and more each day. So why do I have such a hard time believing it? How long will it be before I do?
People change; I know that. I know I have. And I know there are those in my life who don't see it. But I know I have. My heart is different. I'm at peace, most of the time. I'm more compassionate than I used to be; more patient with others not changing than I used to be. I think somewhere along the line I realized whether others do what they need to do, or choose health or kindness, that doesn't change the mandate on my life. Or free me from the choice of kindness or harshness, acceptance or rejection.
And at the same time, there are people in my life who AREN'T in my life. For good reason. Toxic doesn't begin to describe it. Chris said yesterday, when he was here picking up boxes, that his friend was a really toxic relationship for him. I thought it interesting that he saw that. I think it will be interesting to see what happens with that in the long run...without a doubt, Chris is right. But will he follow through by limiting this guys presence in his life? Time will tell.
Seems like there's been alot of clarity lately in that area; toxic relationships. Sad to see in in the next generation (sounding like a geezer to myself!!) and I wish I had seen it earlier in my life, but I guess I had to get whooped by life a bit to recognize and own that I can walk away.
My two biggest walk-aways have been my mom and sister. They are eerily similar in how they relate to others and the world and it does the same damage with both generations. Why they think attacking/retreating thinking things are better because they aren't screeching/attacking/self-pity because there isn't a relationship/apology/attacking will work, is beyond me. It used to exhaust me; frustrate me; make me a little crazy trying to get them to see.
Then the watershed moments happened and I got it that things were never going to change; and as much as I chose to protect my kids from abuse by not allowing them near my abuser, I choose to protect myself now. I don't know if I'll regret it later, but I know I'm a much more peaceful person without their chaos in my life. I feel sorry for my mom; she really doesn't see what her emotional and verbal abuses do to those around her. She is truly oblivious to the damage that she has done and continues to do to those in her life...all while saying how much she misses us.
My sister, is a different story. She gets vicious. Cruel almost beyond being able to heal from it. Then tells us all how wonderful she is and how the people in her life would tell us how proud they are of her; what a good person she is. All within a verbal attack that sends me reeling. No longer directed at me because I don't give her access to my life; but it's awful to watch. And getting the veiled, smackdown comments that are clearly directed at me but said to others. It's heartbreaking...somewhere along the line I quit being furiously angry about it and now I'm just sad.
What would I do if I had the relationship with my kids they have with theirs? My siblings talk to my mom (those that do) with dread and out of obligation. That is not how God intended it. I don't think either of my nieces talk to my sister. What if my kids cut me out of their life? Would I stubbornly insist I was a good mom? Or would I live in the denial and refusal to even ask the questions necessary to get to the truth?
And on days like this, I see the scar within myself that my family of origin has left...insecurity, wondering if I'm as crazy as they are, as detached from reality as they are. Maybe I'm NOT the person I think I am. Maybe I am toxic too. Maybe. Maybe.
So that's what I've been thinking today...

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Whip it up Wednesday

So I was trying to whip up an explosion box and am totally confused...which led me to think about dinner...which led me to this yummo recipe I was going to make for the youth group girls on Monday, which led to THAT being postponed till Monday of this coming up week...but here's the recipe!!


Healthy Chow Mein
1 pound lean pork sliced into thin strips or 1 lb ground turkey

1 tablespoon canola oil
1/2 cup sliced celery
1 bunch washed green onion, sliced including tops
1/2 cup red bell pepper, diced
3 tablespoons low sodium soy sauce
2 cups low sodium chicken broth
1/2 cup sliced mushrooms
1 package frozen oriental style vegetables, defrosted
1 can of bean sprouts
anything else you want to throw in

1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
3 tablespoons cornstarch
1/4 cup low sodium chicken broth
3 cups cooked hot brown rice
2 tablespoons flax seed, optional

In large skillet heat canola oil, add meat (brown turkey first if you're using turkey), celery, green onion, and red bell pepper. Cook and stir until onion is soft. Add soy sauce, chicken broth, mushrooms, oriental vegetables and ground ginger. Cover and simmer five minutes. In small bowl mix 1/4 cup chicken broth with cornstarch and add to skillet. Bring to a boil stirring constantly. Allow to boil one minute or until mixture begins to thicken.
Serve over hot brown rice. for chow mein or whole wheat spaghetti noodles for lomein. Sprinkle each serving with a pinch of flax seed, if desired.
Serve with a side of spring rolls for healthy yummy or egg rolls for the less healthy crowd!!
Number of Servings: 4-6

Friday, May 7, 2010

Friday Fives

I think I"m going to alternate between Finish it Fridays and Friday Fives. Since I'm not in the middle of anything except the need to buy a cell phone, I'll do FF

1.What are the titles of the last three books you read all of?
Honeymoon, Cross, Living on Less


2.What are the titles of between three and five magazines you subscribe to or used to subscribe to?
Simple Scrapbooks, Creative Keepsakes, Scrapbooks, etc., (there's a theme I am about to leave behind), More and Oprah

3.What’s on your night table?
A tray I made at a mosaic place; earplugs, a lamp, some peppermints (top)
phone, alarm clock (middle)
wayyyyy too many books to mention (bottom)
a basket with notecards and a pen (hanging off one side) and a plaque from my girlfriend (hanging off other side)
4.What are the three best things that happened to you in the past seven days?
Paul brought me flowers; talked to Judy and got all caught up; and my phone contract came up for renewal

5.What was your senior yearbook quote, and what would your yearbook quote be this year if there were such a thing?
No quote. This year:  Teach me to feel another's woe. To hide the fault I see: That the mercy I show to others; that mercy also show to me. (Alexander Pope)
 
See ya Monday!!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Thoughtful Thursday

I've been thinking alot lately....about alot of things. Here they are in no particular order.
  1. It breaks my heart to see my kids struggling. Joseph with the stuff with Lauren, seeing him cry for the first time in years. Seeing him try to balance what he needs to do for himself and what he wants to do for her, trying to navigate fights and confrontations about values not details, and finally realizing it wasn't working. Cassie with the apartment situation and having to carry the lion's share because Chris procrastinates even making a phone call, balancing being a good mom and trying to pack stuff up all while Chris is telling her she's an idiot for doing it. Thinking that he can bully someone, yet again, and get what he wants.
  2. I really don't know what's changed between Paul and I but something has happened and I'm really glad. The walls seem to be coming down by him and I just LIKE him again. I've missed that and am so grateful!!
  3. I miss my nieces. I know they are growing/grown up. But I miss seeing their faces, knowing what's going on in their lives, summers, winters, all of it. Paul keeps saying that's life, but for me that's loss.
  4. I feel like I have too many relationships to maintain. Like I never do a good enough job with anyone, and I don't know how to fix that.
  5. My phone is dying. I don't want to get a phone that is going to cost $30 more a month, but I don't know how I'd do it without the calendar. Honestly.
  6. I'm loving making cards right now; and sending them right away. Not hoarding them.
  7. I think I'm going into menopause!! WHAT???
  8. I think I've found a way to blog that works for me and doesn't make me feel like a failure!! Yep!

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

This just in!!


The Svelte Gourmet Macaroni & Cheese

Serves 8

7 oz elbow or shell pasta (NOT whole wheat)
4 cups cauliflower florets, roughly chopped
1 1/2 cups lowfat (2%) shredded cheddar or cheese blend (I used lowfat 4-cheese Mexican blend and it was fabulous!)
1/4 cup shredded Parmesan
2/3 cup 2% milk (skim would make the fat and calories even lower!)
1 egg
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp butter, melted
2 tbsp panko bread crumbs
butter spray

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Boil pasta in salted water until al dente. Drain well. Steam cauliflower florets until very soft, drain. Let pasta and cauliflower cool a bit while you prepare the other ingredients. Shred the cheese if it's not pre-shredded. Beat the milk, egg and salt together in a small bowl. Mix the melted butter with the panko in another bowl.

Mash the cauliflower with a potato masher, a whisk, or whatever you have handy. Mix it with the pasta until well combined, being careful not to break up the noodles. Take a pinch of each of the cheeses and toss them with the panko/butter. Set aside. Combine the rest of the cheese with the pasta and cauliflower. Spray the bottom and sides of your casserole dish lightly with spray butter, then spread the mixture evenly in your casserole dish. Pour the milk/egg/salt mixture over the top. With your mixing spoon, carefully stir and fold until the milk mixture is combined with the pasta/cauliflower. Sprinkle with the panko/butter/cheese mixture and bake, uncovered, for 30-40 minutes or until the top just starts to brown. Voila!



For more "magic" recipes, try The Svelte Gourmet: A Month of Main Coursescookbook, available at
www.thesveltegourmet.com/products.html.

Whip it Up Wednesday

This was dinner last night. Soooo easy and yummmmmmm!!

Pork tenderloin (1 lb)
1/2 cup Mrs Dash Southwest Chipotle marinade
1/2 cup water
2 cans black beans, drained and rinsed

1 bag corn, steamed
1/2 cup or so Sam's fresh salsa (found in the fresh pizza/refrigerator section)

Throw first set of ingredients in crock pot until meat falls apart. I cooked mine on low for 4 hours (I have a FAST crock pot!!) and another 3 hours on warm.

I served this with couscous last night, but make it with brown rice alot.  You can shred this and make it with tortillas too.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Tuneful Tuesdays

Bon Jovi's Hallelujah is my first song choice. Not sure why. I love the song, whether it's Shrek, Jason Castro or Tim Urban singing it. But this is my favorite version, on Lost Highway.

Monday, May 3, 2010

5 Things I love

So I was challenged to come up with five things I love, other than the obvious.

1) I love this picture. I scrapped it today. I got it repritned at Snapfish in 8x10 and the entire page is "the three girls". I was an overlapping member of the three girls and "the three little ones". The ultimate middle child, I guess.
2) I love the smell of lilacs. I literally stop in my tracks when I smell them, trying to find hte source if I can't see it immediately.
3) I love diet Cherry pepsi. It's my current favorite pop.
4) I love uplifting messages.
Heard one at www.parkviewchurch.com this morning. The May 2nd one. It made me glad I've stuck out the last five years.
5) I love my hair straightener. LOL. But really I do. It's 2", it gets super hot and doesn't damage my hair. It's a purple bedhead brand.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

A layout and a Check in on resolutions

I could have sworn I posted my resolutions here, but I can't find that post...so here they are, along with a check in point
Here are my new year's resolutions.
  • Organizing Clean out the basement. Finish purging and get it to Goodwill by 3/1
    • Basement done; scrapbook supplies not even planned on done so they can be donated to Leeza's place. ALL my scrapping supplies are now in my scrapping room and everyone who ever buys stuff for me knows NOT TO GET ME ANY MORE!!
  • Financial Pay off bills. Keep chipping away and no travel plan probably for another year. Sucky but effective. Get at least 3 medical bills paid off and continue to live on cash.
    • Paid off Berkeley, Phillips and one hospital bill. Paid off Discover, Carsons, Old Navy. Now just have the two whoppers. Still on cash. Change to travel plan because we got a ridiculous tax refund!
  • Treat myself Get a pedicure in May, July, September. See 10 movies, and read 12 books
    • Haven't seen any movies since Christmas; have read 4 books; also got a pedicure but that got ruined when I put on my shoes!! LOL
  • Stay in Touch Call Mondays-Judy on the way to work; Melissa on the way home. Thursdays-Michelle. Lunch with Lauren once a month, hang out with Cassie 2x/month Go to Scrap Cabana crops with Theresa
    • Calls are working really well; spent time with Cassie yesterday and definitely are seeing her, in general, a couple times a month. Next crop is in 2 weeks!!
  • Give time Continue to volunteer at the Bin, work with small groups and SW office. Step away from RFKC.
    • Stepped away from the Bin, still doing small groups (not sure how long it will last though...they seem to be fizzling) and SW office work is getting more and more. Feel like I'm approaching balance in this area.
  • Health Be aware of what goes in my mouth; stay on eating plan; work out 30 minutes on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays
    • Getting really good at eating...still not enough but the stuff I am is the right stuff. Still not working out. Definitely have to move it up my priority list.
  • Scrapping 365 pages, 12 projects from the tower o'projects and get my pages in albums immediately. Focus on Joseph and Cassie at Scrap Cabana crops.
    • Have 110 pages done, 6 projects done (not from the tower o'projects though) and am looking at a box of pages that need to get in album before I go to my next crop.
  • Spiritual Read through the NT this year. Be aware of what is coming out of my mouth..especially when I'm frustrated!
    • So much better mouthwise; am struggling with the NT but am steadily reading. I think I'm a month behind...at least that's how it feels to me!!
  • Marriage Be intentional with Paul…not sure what this is going to look like in action, but something needs to change!!
    • Kinda funny but this is great. I've completely let go of expectations with him (which is, I think,  why everything else is so good...my disappointment isn't draining my energy) We're getting along, for now, very well. I'm learning to live in the moment better and better.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Project Life 2010

I finally started my project life 2010!! Well, I've been taking pictures but finally did my layouts. I'm really excited now that it's "in progress". I have become more aware of the little things in life, as well as how my life is often mundane. I think one of my biggest realizations is I need to bring meaning to my life. I need to look beyond the busy-ness and "mundaneness" of life to what brings beauty for the day and appreciate that.



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Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Accentuate the positive...

was the challenge for yesterday, but I had a migraine, so I'm doing it today!
Ten things that are positive in my life:
1)  I love my church. Love it. Love the pastors. Love the attitude. Love the gratitude. Love the humility. Love it.







2)  My children. They amaze me. Make me laugh. Make me cry. Make me pray more. Mostly make me thankful that they call me mom.
3)  The letting go of things/expectations and the freedom I feel as a result. Unburdened.
4)  My nieces and nephew. They are just fun to be around. They have grown to be people I like. I admire.


5)  I'm scrapping and creating more. I love it!! Love it. I feel like I'm doing something for me, but at the same time, it's almost always for someone else's benefit. I hope I can stay in the habit of doing it as often as I have been.



6)  My Soul Sisters. A group of ladies I get together with to eat and pray. Just share life together and a few laughs. Tears sometimes. But mostly just lovin each other.
7)  Plugging away at getting debt free. It feels good. It feels right. Ok, and a little late. But good. Definitely good.
8)  Judy. My die hard, great friend. Honest. Funny. Snippets or long talks. She is a treasure in my life and I pray always will be.
9)  Ronnie. Of course. My constant source of laughter, adoration, joy. Baby smell. Tenderness. Sweet. Beautiful boy.
10) Bet you thought I wouldn't include Paul. HA! I did. He's the person I've loved longest and most fiercely in life, except my brother Joe. Letting go has enabled me to be with him in a better, freer way. I like it. He is a hard worker, a good provider. He is learning to be more honest. He is a better dad to the kids than he used to be. He's a work in progress and I feel honored and humbled to be observing it. Loving him makes me pray more. And challenges me to be honest with myself more. And that makes me grow.
I could go on and on, I realize as I'm writing this. I'm blessed.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Character is simply habit long continued--Plutarch
Great quote, eh? Well, I love it. It's been a hectic couple of weeks, and I am realizing that I need to peel away yet another layer of request/demands/expecations on my time. So I'm gonna contemplate here what is working well, and what I want to tweak, 6 weeks into this year of living my priorities:
Working well:
I'm seeing Cassie more (once a week). I'm talking to her more. Makes me happy to chat and hear her laugh.
I'm talking to both Melissa and Michelle more often. A couple rough weeks with Melissa with our schedules colliding, but all in all, it's working.
Stepping away from youth group is what has made me more available mentally and emotionally to my top priorities. I don't see going back for the foreseeable future.
Joseph is working crazy hours (like 7a-9p between the two jobs) and I don't see him much, but at least I'm totally available to him when I DO see him. I wonder if he notices. That was one of his big complaints to me before.
I've scrapped more at home in the last month than I did in the last 6 months, I think. I like it.
I feel like I've really let go my expectations with Paul. We've had some great conversations lately too. Maybe they are related. Maybe not. I just know I'm happier with the less expectations, and I'm enjoying the connection we do have. Is it cynical to add:  while it lasts!?!?!? LOL

What's not working so well:
getting sucked in to others' dramas. While I'm thankful it isn't my drama, I'm not enjoying this aspect of my life. Not sure where to go from here with that. I do care what happens to my friends, but I can't really help them other than listen. And with the kids I mentor...well, it's their stage in life...drama-central.
Still not connecting with Judy as much as I'd like. It seems like we only connect if I call her and if I'm busy it can be weeks between. Sigh.
I've been eating like crap and it reflects on how I feel. I started this week (ok, so it's only Tuesday!!) to eat better and about 10 last night I crack out the Doritos...and that is SUCH A NO NO!!! Ugh. Those individual bags I never am tempted to eat...but the big family sized bags...they should be labelled "TEMPTATION" not "Doritos"!!

Scrapping and cricuting...working on a train for Ronnie. Will probably be done tomorrow.  Pulled out these die cuts, from 1999, to use on Joseph's birthday layouts. The challenge was to use exactly 10 items. I had to add the red strip to make it ten items. And I made that light saber!! I was all proud of myself!!
This was another ancient compilation. The Gone Fishin' is an old page topper thing from 1999 also, but I trimmed it and chalked it and can live with it!! The fishing pole was an old die cut kit (make it yourself) from about 1999 also. I knew I had pix of Joseph fishing, and finally was able to get the fishing pix with the fishing embellie!! I posted this layout to a group online and a gal thought it was Ronnie, not Joseph. A sure sign I need to pick up my scrapping production. Joseph is barely 6 in this picture and Ronnie will be 6 in no time!!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Ugh and some layouts

Ok, so now not only did I lose my pix (Thanksgiving through Christmas celebrations), but I lost my darn blog post about it. UGH!! Sometimes I hate technology!! Short story, after 10 days of trying to retrieve lost pix, I have a few bad thanksgiving shots and family game day which I will use to recreate Christmas. I was pretty heartbroken, but what can I do but what I did to try to save them? Sooo...moving on to the layouts I did last night
A little rubon, a little border stickers, a sketch and voila!!
This one was from  his first driving experience, at Great America. He was so excited to be able to drive on his own!! New driver stickers, only 5 years old, combined with enen more ancient paper and a new journaling block and swirl from my cricut, bringing the old and new together!! LOL
This one was from Joseph's school program, but I liked the patriotic theme and continued with it. I think this border sticker is at least 7 years old. Works for me!!









And my favorite project so far this year... made with my Cricut!!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

So I heard this song

 at church on Sunday...and in compilation with the women's conference, the sermon of Sunday, this song really hit me between the eyes. Made me reflect on what kind of friend I am.  Friend to the people in my life, my family, my husband. Because before love comes friendship. And I wonder.  Wonder if I see myself for who I really am. Wonder if I've hurt people and am completely unaware.  It's been echoing in my soul

What kind of a friend could pull a knife
When it's him or you and his kids need shoes?

What kind of friend would do you in
When the bomb goes off and the shelter's his?
What kind of friends do friends become
When the musical chairs get down to one?
What kind of friend could I become?
What kind of friend am I?

What kind of friend would tell you lies
To spare you from the bitter truth?
What kind of friend could stoop so low
As to shield your eyes from the mirror's gaze?
What kind of friends do friends become
When a blind eye turns on the damage done?
What kind of friend could I become?
What kind of friend am I?

What kind of friend survives the night
In a frightened sense of self-defence?
What kind of friend can take the ache
Of losing face for friendship's sake?
What kind of friend do friends become
When the heart says "kill" and the soul says "love"?
What kind of friend could I become?
What kind of friend am I?

The women's conference was on choices available to us, dozens of times a day, and most of which we don't see. The two that jumped out at me HUGE was the choice to show mercy and the choice to forgive. Not just the big things...the little things.  The socks on the floor, the late home to dinner. I find it much harder to not let that get under my skin than the big ones. The big ones devastate. Destroy. Bring me to my knees. Which is where I need to be anyway. But I am profoundly aware that I need God's help to forgive the big things. They are too big for me. Too much. Too painful. But the little ones? Oh those, I can forgive on my own, right? I can overlook. Except all too often I don't. And if I'm on my knees, I SEE my need to rely on God for the grace to forgive. If not, I'm looking down, judging, evaluating, blaming. What I'm not is gracious, allowing others to be human. Choosing to let God judge and me not.
When the speaker told her story of her marriage, and talked about the baggage her husband brought to their marriage and how she was so self-righteous about her relatively small amount of baggage, it really struck a chord with me. She went on to say that he couldn't defend himself against her judgment AND work on his baggage, and that only in the letting go of him and looking at her own stuff, was he able to have the energy to work on his stuff. Both are a full time job...being in a defense position and working through pain that goes back decades. Which do I choose to be? The one sitting in judgment or the one allowing grace? I choose grace today. I hope I choose it tomorrow.
And then on to church on Sunday...do you love or do you hate? There is no middle ground. You can not hate a Christian brother/sister and be living in the light. Do you use your mouth to encourage, build up, or do you use it to kill, using murderous words and tones? Do you use your hands to point out other's flaws, or to lend a helping hand? Do you use your eyes to choose to overlook the humanity, flaws and struggle of another? Or to judge, criticize, condemn?
Quite the challenges for me...I'm on day three of more grace and forgiveness. I'd like to post next month that I"m on day 33, but I feel the struggle. I feel the whispers creeping in. Back to my knees...for the little things.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Contemplating favies


What are your favorite things?
~a warm cup of tea with peppermint creamer
~my blanket and waterbed
~believing that hope makes a difference



Do you have a favorite photo? Lately, it's this one of Ronnie on Christmas. He loved making us "pitties" with the bows


A favorite treat?
Mint meltaways from Albanese candy factory in Indiana. Joseph and Lauren discovered them for me. I eat them miserly at the rate of about 1 a week till they are gone, which, sadly, is the current state of my candy stash


A favorite guilty pleasure?
The View


An un-favorite?
Fighting/distance with people I love. Not knowing how to cross the chasm.


A favorite memory recorded?

Most recently, the crop this past weekend. Just load of laughs and fun and productive too.


A favorite moment savored?
Ronnie's birth. What an honor, an amazing moment, a vision of strength and determination, then a new life that has changed mine forever.


A favorite what-did-you-just-say?
Honest. To be pronounced Hone-est.


A favorite moment of introspection?
SO many to choose from…lately it was today and realizing that things will never stay the same if one of us doesn't change the course of things.


A favorite old page upon which you still love to gaze?
The page Cassie and Joseph made me for Mother's Day one year. It will always be on my wall.


or one that still makes you smile?
Joseph's unit picture. LOL


A favorite new page that might have to stay out for special viewing for just a minute longer?

Melissa's graduation from college. I am considering framing it I like it so much.


A favorite product?
For scrapping, my cricut. For life, my tea maker.


A favorite journaling strategy?
Just do it. I love the memory maker journaling blocks. I've journalled more since discoverying them than all the years before combined.


A favorite style? I love simple, clean, focus on the picture


A favorite season?
Fall…I can breathe, I love the colors and my clothes!! LOL


A favorite bit of current life?
Ronnie layouts of course…he's so darn funny!!


of everyday living?
My Life 2010 project…it makes me focus daily on my world


Do you play favorites?
Yes, I sure do


Are your favorites fickle?
No…once a favie, always a favie.


Do you have favorite people?
Yeah, I do. If you are reading this, you are probably one of them.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Off to the crop


and I can't wait!! I've got my pages picked, my pictures prepared, my sketches printed out. I've got my food (as in HEALTHY!!) bought, my snack to share (Poppycock on sale for $1.75 from $8.00 originally) packed up.
My goal is to:
laugh till I cry at least once (no doubt I will with Glenda and Theresa around)
get some sleep thanks to Theresa's new snoring mechanism
relax, have fun
spend nearly zero
scrap at least 75 pages
make at least 3 cards
complete 5 challenges
Theresa won't be there till late on Friday...but I'm gonna be there as soon as it opens!!


Monday, January 11, 2010

Today in Three Acts



Act 1

Home~Woke up too early for my tastes~put away the laundry that's waited 5 days (4 baskets!!)~ate whole grain waffles for breakfast~~savored my chocolate tea with mint creamer in my favorite polka dot cup~checked my email~spent too long on Cafemom trying to read journal on my favie group~texted Lauren in FL~Called Cassie/no answer



Act 2

Work~Listend to midday connection on WMBI on the way to work and literally laughed out loud several times over the "Man Rules"~Called Paul, which I never do, to tell him how funny it was and laughed all over again!!~Cindy wasn't there so there was a computer for me to work on~the farm house was warm today hallelujah!!~Mouse in the upstairs toilet makes me never want to use it again!!~Found out I totally forgot the Baptism student books. Ugh.~Did the usual Monday work…it was very quiet there today. Usually there's so much more convresation~Will be doing the bulletin while BW is in Hawaii~left with things still to do




Act 3

Called Cassie on the way home; no answer~talked to Melissa for a while as she flipped her stuff on Sable (something about a hussy) for getting the sheets dirty~Home again~roast in the over for dinner smells delicious; didn't end up as tender as I thought~ate dinner and laughed with Joseph and Paul; it's a good day to be here~worked on my swap~printed out sketch books~threatened Theresa with death if she doesn't take care of the snoring for this weekend~starting planning what to bring~Facebook for 2.5~Joseph off to surprise Lauren at the airport~Tired and ready for bed!!